Tip 4: You Do Not Have to Be a Ride or Die Partner
Let go of being the “ride or die” in all your relationships. A woman who is a “ride or die” is someone who will do whatever for a person they love. This can be a partner, friend or family member. Usually, it means you exhibit an extreme loyalty that can also lead you into unfulfilling situations. Ask yourself “why should you die for love?” (mentally, physically or emotionally)
Stop seeking relationships where you can act as a savior to an individual. Find connections where the energy you put out is reciprocated. Listen to your intuition and embrace relationships that elevate your life!
However, you choose to articulate your No, rest assured it is a full, complete and empowering answer. No additives or sweeteners are required.
Nah, Nope, Aht Aht or Hell Naw! Whatever vernacular you choose, stand by it.
There are only so many meetings that you can take, a limited number of events that you can attend and a small number of responsibilities that you can give your full attention to.
If peace is what you seek, you have to be available to receive it. Make time for self-preservation and mental rejuvenation.
With February being the designated month for the collective to focus on Love, do that! Focus on Self-love, Sisterly-love, Passionate-love, Compassionate-love and of course Black-love!
Allow love to be your compass towards peace. Gravitate toward those people, places and feelings that provide you with genuine fulfillment, while saying No to those things that leave you feeling confused and depleted.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t work on things that you find challenging; I simply suggest you find a mentor or coach to help you get a handle on those things.
Now that you understand the empowerment in your No, let’s focus on a few things that you can say Yes to that will hopefully add peace to your life through expressive love toward self and others.
Consider trying a few of the activities listed below to help empower you toward self-preservation & mental rejuvenation:
Sisterly Love: Reach out to a few of your good girlfriends and let them know that you appreciate having them in your life. If you didn’t know Galentine’s Day (2/13/22) is right around the corner. This day is the unofficial day that is set aside for you and your girls to get together and chop it up. Since Galentine’s Day is the same as Superbowl Sunday this year, slip away for some girl time. You can do a virtual or in-person brunch or afternoon gathering or drop a cute card in the mail. I’m sure they will appreciate the thought.
Black Love: It’s Black History Month All Year but it’s officially recognized during the month of February. Hopefully you’re educated on Civil Rights History, Slavery Emancipation and well-known Black Inventors and Innovators. I challenge you to embrace a different perspective this time around. Take a few minutes to read or listen to: The 1619 Project: Born on the Water by Nikole Hannah-Jones and Renee Watson. I’m even sharing my Audible link with you to make it easy. This quick read is told in a series of poems that create a narrative; the story opens with a young Black girl given a school assignment to trace her ancestry. Despondent, she tells her grandmother about her shame at being unable to complete the assignment. Grandma then tells the story of their ancestors. Refreshingly, that story starts pre-enslavement, in West Central Africa: “Their story does not begin / with whips and chains. / They had a home, a place, a land, / a beginning. / … / Before they were enslaved, they were / free.” Several spreads are dedicated to celebrating the ancestors’ language, skilled hands, sharp minds, joyful hearts, and amazing dancing. https://www.audible.com/pd/The-1619-Project-Audiobook/0593459989?action_code=ASSGB149080119000H&share_location=pdp&shareTest=TestShare
Compassionate Love: Show love by doing something for others. Visit DoSomething.org for service ideas.
Passionate Love: I’m not one for broadcasting my love life on social media but I wholeheartedly believe in making sure my partner feels validated. Do something meaningful for the one you love. Make that man feel special! Put that woman first! (LOL!) Do whatever you gotta do to keep the love alive.
Self-Love: Take time for yourself. Slow down and do (or not do) all the things you love. Listen to your body and give it what it needs. A few examples of things that you can do for self-care are Spiritual Baths, Healing Rituals, or spending time with friends. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s something you can enjoy.
The activities listed above should get you well on your way to feeling rejuvenated and peaceful.
When you’re ready to tackle those challenges mentioned earlier, fill out the contact form below and I’ll help you work through it.
Don’t miss out on the following special offerings throughout the month of February:
Outside of relationship with God, I am lost. There are no number of Social Activities, Work Engagements or other Commitments that allow me to feel the same satisfaction as having a true and uninhibited relationship with God.
In relationship I find peace, understanding, structure and stability.
I will embrace my uniqueness and seek to fully understand the work that I have been purposed to complete.
The closer I move toward God the more I understand who I am in him.
Words of reflection: relationship, satisfaction, uniqueness, uninhibited, purposed, structure, stability
This week at Origins of Peace, LLC we’re focusing on Time Management and Organization. My goal is to introduce a few tips and techniques that you can put into action that will hopefully help you maximize your day and add peace to what may be a chaotic daily routine. The tools that I share can be used both personally and professionally.
The first thing that I want you to do is take a brief self-assessment. Circle all of the words below that describe how you are currently feeling or have felt in the past 7 days:
anxious procrastination lack of sleep lack of focus low energy missed deadlines decreased work productivity overextension
panicky over-whelm lateness stress irritably tardiness decreased quality of work inability to set and achieve goals
Reflect on the words that you circled as you dive into this week’s materials.
We’re kicking things off by looking at one of the 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership. Proper leadership is important in your personal and professional life. Let’s be real, if you can’t properly lead your own life, you have absolutely no business trying to influence anyone else. The Law of Magnetism says, ‘who you attract is not determined by what you want, it’s determined by who you are. Let’s think about who you are in relation to this law. Are you anxious, panicky, stressed or irritable? Do you procrastinate, have low energy, or feel over-whelmed? If any of these describe how you are feeling or have recently felt, you have to put structure around those negatives in order to transpose them into positives.
Poor Time Management and inefficient Organization are often the cause of many of these symptoms. If you feel erratic, you will attract erratic elements into your life. This includes people, circumstances and feelings.
In your personal life, incorporate activities that allow you to save time and make things more convenient for yourself. I like to utilize Meal Prepping to help me stay on track with healthy eating and to save time. I like to pre-make my meals on Sunday and Wednesday for three days at a time. Meal Prepping allows me to create routine and habit in my life. If nutrition is important to you, give Meal Prepping a try.
I also use Calendars and Planners to help me keep up with appointments and obligations. In the past I’ve always started the year off using these tools but after a few months of documenting my schedule, my consistency waivers. This year I’m using “The Very Busy Planner” by Amy Knapp. This all-inclusive planner has prompts to help you reflect on your goals, tips to keep your happiness elevated and quotes to get you inspired! One of my favorite pages in this planner is the “Lemons to Lemonade” page. It’s an ideation page that provides space for me to jot down activities that promote joy when I’m feeling down.
In your professional life, self-care is important as well as digital transformation.
For self-care I pull out all the stops. When you start a self-care routine it is important to incorporate things that speak to you personally. I incorporate massages, meal prep, sound therapy, time management, daily devotions and self-help rituals. Out of all these things, the most important self-care technique that I incorporate is creating my own personal narrative. I personally believe life is what you make it and how you start doesn’t dictate how things will end for you. You have the power to change your situation and create a new way forward. If you’ve been around here long enough, you’ve heard of a Peace Map. Use the template below to start your journey.
Digital Transformation is a company’s ability to integrate technology into its processes and business structure. If you are a business owner, consider using Google or Microsoft Products to help organize your business and provide structure. You can create and store your files online, facilitate online coaching and consulting sessions and even host group workshops. The number of business opportunities available to you through digital transformation is incredible. To incorporate Digital Transformation, you have to understand your services and the processes used to accomplish them. If you need help achieving this, use the contact form below to set an appointment with me.
This week, through narratives, videos and audio recordings I will share more content to help you refine your Time Management and Organizational Skills. Take the following actions to get access to all of my content:
Hey Hey! You are tuned in to the first Episode of Timeout!
Today I’m talking about Daily Devotionals. As a woman who decided to take a Timeout from the constant chaos, and the daily duties of life in order to focus more on things that add peace, joy & delight to my existence, please accept this as your personal invitation to join me in my quest.
I hope you will listen in and gain inspiration on how to jazz up your reflective time.
When you’re finished, leave me a comment and let me know if this Episode has been helpful for you.
Seasons change and people can to. I remember one of my most prominent transformation journeys occured during the Springtime. I was experiencing an extended time of sadness and frustration, stuck in what I thought was an admirable life but I could never shake the feelings of inadequacy, unhappiness and consistent anxiety.
From personal experience, I can tell you that having faith the size of a mustard seed is all you need to pivot and then transform. Tough things happen to some of the best peo
ple in the world and often they cannot find the motivation or strength to overcome those
challenges.
I’m here to tell you that Transformation is possible with the right plan of action!
I want to help you realize the change that you need and to come face to face with the conflicts that are keeping you from showing up as your best self.
Heal…Recover…Grow is a 12 Week Transformation Program that will help you create a new mindset, create a new path forward and motivate you to take action for improvement. I personally invite you to take this guided journey with me.
You can expect a comprehensive program that will equip you with the tools you need to realize real change in your life.
If no one has told you, allow me to be the first, “You have creative freedom over your life and it’s time to write your next Chapter”.
“Black Women live, create and build with the future in mind, because the present has no place for us. In order to stay alive, we have to imagine ourselves in a future where we not only survive but thrive. A place where we are understood. A place where we still exist. This is a tall order in the world but this is the way we make the present work for us, every day, and it’s the reason I’m most proud of us.” -Shayla Lawson
I have read this quote so many times over the past week and each time is more triggering than the time before . Whether you agree with the quote or not, it is nearly unbearable to know, understand and feel the perspective that is voiced here.
I believe this quote is a great place to start in order to take a deeper look into the “State of Black Women”, more specifically how we cope with life’s daily requirements, how we celebrate our wins and how we respond to the heartbreak of those tough lessons that we have no other choice but to learn.
It has long been said, “black women are so strong”. I would argue the point that many of us are strong because we have to be strong, not because we necessarily want to be. In a world where we are constantly working to make the world a safer place for everyone else but ourselves, we nuture, we advocate, we protest and we support our fair share of people and causes. We do all the things necessary to help others survive. Consequently, we are too overwhelmed and burdened to do the same things for ourselves.
Let’s talk about it.
What are your thoughts about this quote? Do you agree or disagree with this point of view?
I belive many Black Women find their validation in the work they do to help others and in their efforts to solution the world’s problems. Rarely does the message of simply being enough and contributing as our authentic self come into the conversation. Constantly living, creating and building with the future in mind is a huge endeavor to tackle, but that’s how we, Black Women make it. We are forward thinkers. It’s also why we have such a huge problem sticking to a self-care routine. We’re expected to always be ON….on point, on target, on top things….it’s alot!
My vision for Black Women is a world where we are respected for who we are, appreciated for our contributions but also given equal opportunites to rest, to rejuvenate and to love.
One of the core principles of Originis of Peace is “Self-Preservation”. We empower women with the skills and know-how to set boundaries, manage overwhelm and gain clarity around their goals and objectives. Self-Preservation is defined as the act of keeping oneself from destruction or harm, a natural or instintive tendency to act as to preserve one’s own existence.
In a few weeks I’m kicking off my 12 week course entitled; Heal..Recover..Grow to help you GROW through what you GO through.
We will focus on 3 Essential Concepts:
Heal – Be the heroine of your life, not the victim
Recover – Own your story; stop running from it
Grow – Be open to all experiences, understanding that both happiness and sadness have their respective places
All Sessions are virtual. Additional information will be shared later this week.
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I’m here to tell you that Transformation is possible with the right plan of action!
