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Affirm To Nurture Your Relationships

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Affirmation #2I am creating true relationships and lasting connections by being grateful for each encounter, providing support without compromising my boundaries and holding space for us to evolve.”

I wrote this affirmation while thinking about the complexities of relationships and how self-love is a direct reflection of how we love others.

I am a firm believer in self-preservation and protecting my peace by properly managing my circle of influence but I understand fully that my relationships and how I show up in them are a direct reflection of how I show love to myself.

If I’m constantly telling myself that I am inadequate or lacking in certain areas, I will feel that I have the authorization to speak those same inequities into the lives of others.

This is completely false.

No one has the right to infuse their personal self-doubt on anyone else.

Affirm to Nurture Your Relationships.

  1. Decide today that you will speak better to yourself, think more highly about who you are and begin to value your own opinion.  By doing so, you create a nurturing foundation that will be the basis for all of your relationships
  2. Set boundaries that create positive encounters. Make a decision to stop interjection your unsolicited opinions in other people’s lives. Nine times out of ten, nobody asked you…so stop. Leave something to the imagination.
  3. Express gratitude when someone shares their time, energy, knowledge and love with you

Remember: Your thoughts, words and actions should be for your greatest good and to be of service to others. Hold thoughts and actions toward others in the same regard.

Create your peace,

~Melissa

 

 

 

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Affirm to Love Yourself

Hey PeaceMakers!

I hope all is well for each of you and I pray that life is being kind to you.

Recently I held an Affirmation Challenge on Instagram.  I shared affirmations with the hope of  helping to build self-esteem and combat self-sabotage. You can click here to view the affirmations that I shared. Feel free to incorporate them into your daily self-care routine.

If we aren’t already connected on social media, I invite you to follow me on Instagram and Facebook. My handle is Originsofpeace on both.

I want to take a look at each affirmation, starting with day 1 and understand how each should be used.

Affirmation #1 – “I am creating self-love by reciting positive words, thinking loving thoughts and setting standards that protect my mind, body and spirit.”

Caring for yourself involves performing actions that protect your well being. Your thoughts, actions, ideas and self-talk are all part of self-care.

This week, I encourage you to think big, bold and confidently when it comes to practicing self care. Do your thoughts need to be re-aligned, is there someone or something that deserves a NO, or do you simply need to appreciate yourself more.

I like the thought of self-care through self-appreciation. What three things can you celebrate about yourself? What are you good at? What have you accomplished? What are you working on? Have you been a positive influence to someone lately? Whatever it is, appreciate all that you’ve accomplished or all that you have in the works!

These are the first steps to cultivating self-love.

As a monthly practice of gratitude, I am gifting subscribers on my email list with a full size package of my custom herbal tea blend and a mug.

To ensure that you are included, go to my website: www.designedbymelissarivers.com. 

When the subscribe form pops up, enter your name and email address. The drawing is being held today, September 2 and the winner will be notified via email.

September Focus and Mug Giveaway

Lastly, start thinking about how you want to finish out the year. Did you make goals earlier in the year that you have yet to fulfill? Is it time to revamp your wellness goals?

I am a firm believer that wellness of mind, body and spirit is the necessary foundation for achieving your goals. My ebook, Design Your Happy Track to Peace is available on my website for a 20% discount. Use code LABORDAY at checkout.

“you have to love yourself because no amount of love from others is sufficient to fill the yearning that your soul requires from you.” ~Dodinsky

Until we speak again, have an excellent day and make peace your top priority!

~Melissa

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When Good is No Longer Good Enough

Peace Up! It’s been a while since my last post. In my absence I hope that life has been good to you and I hope that you’ve been good to yourself. I pray that you’ve taken time to indulge in things that you love and that you’ve experienced happiness and joy. As the saying goes, “life is not a dress rehearsal,” so get out there and live it!

Since my last post, I’ve turned the big 44. This is a huge deal for me because my birthday signifies another year of surviving and overcoming. Along with my 44th birthday, I celebrate being 4 years cancer free and 4 years free from a troubled marriage.

Life is good.

Life is really good but in this next year, good is no longer good enough. I’m ready for the exciting, adventurous and spontaneous.

I’m ready to start living again and experiencing new things. I’ve been in maintenance mode for far too long. Protecting my peace and preserving my happiness has been defined as making sure problems get solved, ends meet and opportunities are realized. I need a new definition. I need to incorporate things that I love such as: relaxing by the lake, driving to the mountains, hanging with friends and making time for self-care.

This one life that I’ve been blessed with, deserves an overhaul.

I’m sure that I’m not alone. Have you reached a placed in your life that no longer represents who you are or what you stand for? Are you ready to create new memories? Is good no longer good enough?

Now’s the time.

It’s time to choose different and to choose better. Peace is not simply the absence of conflict, but also the inclusion of all the things that celebrate who you are!

Challenge:

  • Make a list of the things that make you happy but you seldom experience. As a child I loved gymnastics and ballet. I haven’t participated in those activities in years but the memories always make me smile.
  • Once you’ve compiled your list, be the first person to send me your list in an email and you could win a free sample of my Peaceful Herbal Tea. Send your email to:info@designedbymelissarivers.com.
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Burnout AF

In a time where chasing the next greatest trend, fad, influencer or improve thyself technique is the thing to do, people are fiercely striving for perfection in their professional and personal lives. This non-stop sprint for greatness has left a majority of folks stressed out, tired and overwhelmed. As a result, the World Health Organization (WHO) has declared “Burnout” as a diagnosable condition. Their definition of burnout focuses solely on the professional perspective but I believe if we fail to equally consider personal burnout in the definition, we are only examining half of the issue.

 

My personal definition of burnout is: having feelings of exhaustion and extreme tiredness with increased mental isolation from one’s personal and professional  responsibilities which result in reduced productivity.

Many people experience burnout in their personal and professional lives without realizing it. There’s the pressure to attain a certain lifestyle or to achieve a certain social status, but there’s also the pressure to be the one who people can depend on and the one who has it all together.

In the workplace, employees are working longer hours, performing jobs they despise and working through their lunch break to chase the so-called American Dream. Those actions contribute to exhaustion and regret.

Do what you love

If you think you may be suffering from Professional burnout, try incorporating the following actions and seek professional help if necessary.

  1. Establish healthy connections/relationships at work
  2. Unplug during your lunch break; no phone, no meetings, just eat
  3. Schedule quarterly vacation days throughout the year to do something meaningless and fun. Don’t wait until Summer or Christmas break to take time off

Love you

Personal burnout can be a little more difficult to recognize, mainly because no one wants to freely admit when your own life becomes too much to handle. To give you a better understanding of personal burnout, I’m going to extend to you a looking glass into my life.

In 2015, I went through divorce, cancer and job loss all within a 6 month period. I was exhausted, my self-esteem was low, my concentration was non-existent and I was persistently overwhelmed. I did not have a steady income again until November 2016. I was on the verge of losing my home and my sanity. While dealing with all these things, I was raising a teenager, being a supportive daughter, sister, auntie and friend while being completely depleted inside. Personal burnout.

Personal burnout comes from continuously mismanaging your life by neglecting your personal needs and putting the needs of others before your own, neglecting opportunities for self-care and personal well-being and failing to see the beauty in the present moment.

The greatest gift that I’ve learned on my road to self restoration is:

I AM MY PRIORITY.

I’m giving you a few of my top reminders to help you focus on self-care, self-restoration and self-preservation.

  1. Schedule self-care appointments frequently
  2. Unplug from social media often
  3. Use the letters N.O. freely
  4. Don’t lose yourself, trying to save someone else
  5. Live and let live
  6. Always remember: “We each have a life to live and personal burdens to bear. You are here as a support, not a savior.”

For more tips on managing burnout and protecting your peace, subscribe to my blog and newsletter by visiting www.designedbymelissarivers.com.

Peace.

 

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Your Heart Is Bigger Than You Think

I used to think that I only had a limited amount of space in my heart to love and appreciate certain situations, including people. I was convinced that my capacity meter for “stuff” was on the fairly low side. Over the years I’ve been met with unexpected events that challenged my perceived personal truths but also ignited my will to overcome and win. I’ve learned that people are designed to be durable and flexible if we choose to operate at full capacity. Today, I am sharing 3 points of action with you, that will help you create more space in your heart to accept, embrace and handle whatever you find yourself dealing with.

  1. Understand why life has presented you with this opportunity

One of my favorite scriptures in the Bible is; Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”  From this scripture, I am reassured that unexpected events can actually be a blessing in disguise. When the event is truly embraced, our thoughts aren’t directly centered on our personal needs alone and we are challenged to think higher and to make peace with the situation

2.  Focus only on what you have control over

Focus and take action on what you can control and have faith that the things you can’t control will also get taken care of. I’ve learned that good things are often orchestrated on my behalf simply because I did my part and showed up when it was my time to perform. You can find opportunities to be a blessing to others when they least expect it. Believe that the people you are connected to can’t fully do their work/assignment until you complete yours, and you can’t complete your work until others complete theirs. Things that we don’t have control over aren’t ours to control, they are simply an associated assignment. It’s not yours to handle but it is connected to you

3. Remain present and at peace

Do what you can today in order to accept what you’re facing. Taking small, daily steps toward acceptance will open your heart to new capacities of love and will help you navigate through unexpected change.

Challenge: Think about the most intensive challenge that you are currently facing and decide that you are going to rise to the occasion. What can you do today to embrace the change and release negative thoughts surrounding it. How will you show up? Who will you become after it’s over?

Note: To the Origins of Peace community, “thank you all so much for following the blog and for connecting with me in so many different ways. Effective immediately, blog posts will release once a month on or around the 10th of each month, and the Heal, Recover, Grow Newsletter will release quarterly. The next issue is scheduled to release on July 1st.”

You can always connect with me on all social media as Origins of Peace or by emailing me at: info@designedbymelissarivers.com

Peace In Action,

Melissa

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Serene Surroundings

It is officially Spring and I am excited! I am jumping at the chance to create new experiences and to really show gratitude for all that I have and for all that I have overcome. Spring represents newness and rebirth to me. Some of my most challenging experiences have happened during the Spring season, which lead to a new perspective. I now view those experiences as methods that helped me to gain confidence and a new outlook on life. Now more than ever I am determined to live better, make smarter choices and to simply be happy.

It’s easy to overlook the need for change and understand when a fresh start is necessary. Falling into habit and sticking with the routine of how things are traditionally done is simple to do. It’s important for you to know that you are a unique and creative individual. You have the ingenuity and innovation to create space for new opportunities in your life. Maybe you’re just stuck and can’t figure out what’s next. Maybe you’ve told yourself numerous times that you’re not able or that you are incapable of achieving your dreams. Sometimes all it takes is some fresh perspective and a little readjusting.  Readjusting your mental space and your physical space. I appreciate when my space (both mental and physical) is conducive of peace and creativity. When I am at Peace in my space, I can work and create without feeling stifled, but when things are out-of-order, I am totally out of alignment. How about you? What are you looking forward to in this new season and what’s holding you back from going after it?
Many of my ideas are inspired while I am in my backyard, my sacred space. There’s this spot between two of my plum trees that provides me with peaceful and serene feelings. Where’s your space? Have you created a special place in your home or office that sparks your creativity. If you’re feeling stifled and your space is offering you everything but peace, it’s probably time to switch things up.   

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I’ve created a free, easy to follow, six step checklist that will help you to create a more peaceful space. You definitely want to get your hands on it if you want to bring calm and relaxation into your midst. It might be just what you need to usher in the newness that Spring has to offer. Once you download your checklist and implement the changes, you will be on the right road to start creating new experiences. It doesn’t stop with your space, you have 8 areas of wellness that require attention. Your next step is to decide what new experiences you’re going to create and what does the process look like for you? Decide what brings you peace and then go get it! Peaceful Space

If you’re ready to do the work and design a more peaceful life, I would love to work with you and help discover your origins of peace. Schedule a Discovery Call by clicking the button below. Let 2019 be your year to succeed.  Schedule Appointment

Peace!

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Peace Within

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Hi Peace Makers, or should I say Peace Within Makers! I am excited to bring you this week’s blog post. We are discussing boosting our self-esteem through self-care and conflict resolution through positive self talk. I pray that you will find hope and encouragement through today’s reading and as always, I am praying that God gifts you with all the happiness that your heart can hold.

If this is your first time on my site, My name is Melissa Rivers and I am a Creative Peace Designer. That means I use my gifts of creative writing and mentoring to help others manage conflict, realize their hidden potential and create mental space for more peaceful engagements in their lives. My motto for this week is “my peace is constantly unfolding.”

If you haven’t read my last post entitled, A Place To Breathe, click here to get encouraged about pursuing those peculiar hobbies that bring you joy!

So let’s get into it!

What’s My Intention for this post – My intention is to provide tips for boosting your self-esteem through self-care and conflict resolution through positive self talk. Sometimes we can get so busy in life that we forget to slow down and breathe. It’s so easy for anxiety and overwhelm to creep in because we are doing all the things that we normally do, not realizing that we are operating out of stress. Unfortunately by the time most of us realizes that we are stressed out, we are in the midst of a huge meltdown. Through self-care and positive self talk, I regained control over my emotions and turned around, what could have become an unproductive weekend.

What’s Important for you to know -I declared this past Saturday as Melissa’s Self-Care Saturday. I’ve been extremely busying doing all the things that a responsible, grown woman does. If you fall into that category, you know doing all the things can lead to all the stress. As stress occupied my shoulders and mind, I wanted to completely check out and do nothing. Unfortunately with deadlines looming, I had to get creative in my quest to find peace. I grabbed 4 things; my essential oil diffuser, my Doterra Peppermint Essential Oil, my Bentonite Clay and my facial steamer. I created a Peppermint infused spa retreat in my bathroom. I filled my diffuser with water and added a few drops of Peppermint Essential Oil. After turning it on, I plugged in my facial steamer. I allowed the two steams to co-mingle and fill the room with a sense of calmness. After a few minutes of deep breathing and repeating positive self-affirmations, I felt the tension rushing away from my shoulders.

What Matters – Incorporating self-care into your daily routine is important for overall good health. You matter, your physical health matters and your mental health is just as important, if not more. Maybe you’re like me and have an extremely hectic schedule, if that’s the case, grab the items that I listed above and incorporate them into your weekly routine. If you need Doterra Essential Oils, I can help.  Click here and complete the form. I will get in touch with you to place an order. I’ve included links below, to purchase the other items. If you are unfamiliar with the detoxifying  benefits of Bentonite Clay, click here to read an article featured in Mother Nature Living Magazine to learn more. The facial steamer is an important element for dramatic effect. I only use the steamer to fill my room with steam. I know a lot of experts say that steam is great for your face but I tend to break out if I overuse it. One last thing, positive self-talk. You have to speak kindly to yourself in order to maintain peace and calmness. I don’t care how mad you may get or how big of a mistake you may make. Grant yourself some grace and be kind. Remember, your heart is listening and unpleasant words have a way of making a huge imprint. Refer back to my post entitled This Is What Happened, to get a list of affirmations that you can begin incorporating into your routine.

Creating Peace Maps to help individuals discover their fundamental necessities of peace, is what I do. If you would like to work with me, click the button below to schedule a 30 Minute Discovery Call.  Schedule Appointment

Peace,

Melissa

Bentonite Clay, Doterra Essential Oil, Facial Steamer, Essential Oil Diffusser

 

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A Place To Breathe

Good Morning PeaceMakers. I pray that today holds all the peace, love and acceptance that your heart can hold.

If this is your first time on my site, My name is Melissa Rivers and I am a Creative Peace Designer. That means I use my gifts of creative writing & teaching to help others manage conflict and create mental space for more peaceful opportunities in their lives. My motto for today is: “peace starts with a made up mind.”

So let’s get to it:

My intent for this post – I’m writing this morning at 4:30 am because writing/ journaling settles my mind and helps me to organize my thoughts. I guess you could say that I am at peace when I create a short narrative, or inspirational message. Writing is one of my Origins of Peace and my place to breathe. It’s important for each of us to find what helps us breathe deeper and a little easier. The sweet aroma of creativity helps us not to take ourselves so seriously and as adults that can be hard to do.

What’s important for you to know: You gotta breathe. Close your eyes and visualize those activities that you participated in as a kid. Did you dance, sing or take piano lessons. Maybe it was art class or violin practice. Whatever it was, did it provide a few minutes of relief and escape for you? Along with writing, I absolutely loved ballet & gymnastics class. I can remember practicing my back-flip and no-hand cartwheels for hours on end. I’ve never really been great at ballet, but I can remember putting on my pink ballet slippers for the first time along with my white tights and black leotard. I was free to be me.

What matters: You were created to be serious and carefree at the same time. Life will impose it constraints and restrictions upon you but you cannot let that stop your creativity. Your foundational purpose is found in the weeds of your place to breathe and your responsibilities. Intentionally show up for yourself each day in a creative way. If not, you’ll get lost and be afraid of who you truly are. You have too much goodness, purity and creativity to be anyone other than yourself.  Show up for you & breathe.

I offer a session called Peace Mapping where I help you identify areas of conflict in your life and design a strategy that helps you to make different choices and create mental space for a more peaceful lifestyle. I would love to help you find your place to breathe.

To book a session, simply click here to get started.

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The Makings of You

Hi there & Happy Valentine’s Day! I hope everyone is doing well and feeling great! I am excited to share today’s post with you. As promised, I am focusing on song lyrics this month and creating a quick, snippet of inspiration based off of a line or verse.

I heard a little of “The Makings of You,” by Curtis Mayfield the other night and I’ve been listening to it since that day. Beautiful song! For all you lovebirds out there, I recommend playing it for Valentine’s Day. It might score you some extra love points. You can thank me later.

I am inspired by the lyrics, “these are the makings of you, it is true, the makings of you.”

Your presence excites me

The thought of you makes my heart pound

And when I see you, I anticipate the moment that you acknowledge me and say hi

You are wise and kind and gentle with your words. Your affection cannot be duplicated

Your gaze of admiration makes me giddy and vulnerable all at the same time

You have that effect on me

I want to know all about you

How you think and why

You embody love, humility, strength and wisdom

You make me better, not just me but everyone you meet

“These are the true makings of you”

Go in peace and find somebody to make you feel giddy and vulnerable all at the same time. 

~Peace